We ordered lube and rubbers online and because we spent more than $20 they sent us a free (too-big-to-use) dildo. So…
to big to use….?
You know, I’m glad you asked, because it allows me to print a correction.
I originally said it was too big to use, but yesterday I learned an important lesson about determination and believing in yourself.
This is the best post I’ve read in forever.
jesU S ch R I s T
i’m never going to stop laughing
SERIOUSLY BE NICE TO YOUR ANIMALS BECAUSE THEY LOVE YOU MORE THAN YOU DESERVE AND MORE THAN ANY HUMAN EVER WILL
I LOVE LEARNING BAD THINGS ABOUT PEOPLE I DON’T LIKE
And I would have gotten away with it too if it weren’t for you meddling kids and your talking dog
I literally crave affection. It’s not about sex. I crave somebody to cuddle with me, and to lay their head on my lap. I crave kisses, holding hands and running my thumb across theirs. Just looking at someone and thinking “how did I get this lucky”.
I want to see a reality tv show where straight dudes have to read the shitty messages they send to women to their mothers.
I bought my friend an elephant for their room.
They said “Thank you.”
I said “Don’t mention it.”
u deserve a nice boy who texts u back and buys u tacos and doesn’t kiss other girls behind ur back and who makes u laugh and thinks ur funny
why is peter pan always flying?
I love this joke because it never grows old
It has a nice hook.
This doesn’t make sense. I’m lost, boys
MAYBE THIS IS WHY TINKERBELL IS ALWAYS FUCKIN PISSED OFF